


Sacrifice

by Adishailan



Series: Titans, Humans and Gods [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Angry Eren Yeager, BAMF Eren, Blood and Gore, Friendship, Gen, God Eren, Gods, Mystery, POV First Person, Pagan Gods, Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-04
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-04-02 21:56:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4075204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adishailan/pseuds/Adishailan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I was known as the Hunter, lord of Earth and Sacrifice and the Forgotten Things.<br/>Emphasis on the bloody 'was'. Now I've been woken up to a new world.  A world where all memory of me has faded away, where abominations roam the lands freely and the gods are nowhere to be seen.<br/>In plain talk: it's crap.<br/>But when I answer the prayer of a dying woman, I soon find myself stuck babysitting some humans and- well- they're not that bad really... most of them are boring or murderous nitwits (naturally) but a few... they're okay.<br/>On top of making sure my new charges don't trip and kill themselves; I have to also spend my time finding out what happened to all the other gods.<br/>Sounds simple enough... if I could just concentrate on this shit and stop feeling so fucking angry all the time.</p><p> </p><p>  'My eyes instantly focused on the strange enormous creature standing before me, smiling down at me with an odd glazed look in its eyes. </p><p>   "What the fuck are you?" '</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Request

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I hope those of you lucky enough to have stumbled upon my fanfiction enjoy what I've done. Slightly nervous about putting this out there but here's hoping it goes down well. Please feel free to give comments ;) I'd love to get some feedback on this.
> 
> Massive kudos to my beta reader SworntoDevotion who's given me some truly fabulous criticisms and has been really supportive. Cheers me dear!

 

> **Sacrifice** _-_ _An act of giving up something valued for the sake of something else regarded as more important or worthy -_

  

**The Request**

 

The darkness felt endless. Or it would have felt endless if my mind hadn't been full of it, heavy and cloying, holding me tightly in the deep dreamless sleep. 

Then that black weight started to lift. Something was waking me up. 

There was a loud noise; it could have been described as a 'bang' if it wasn't for the prolonged scraping and shuddering tremors that reached me through the earth.  It was too loud and went on too long for a 'bang'. Whatever the noise was, it wasn't what woke me. It was simply a faint echo of the first noise I had ever heard. 

No, what really woke me was the feeling of warmth seeping down my face, the thick smell of iron rolling over me and the sudden spatter of heat coiling in my chest as my body started to stir once again.  

My eyes snapped open and still all I could see was the dark, but I could hear  _so_  much. Screams, prayers and frantic heartbeats spluttering and shouting out high up above me. 

My fingers wormed their way through the earth, pushing through it like an oar through water as I made my way up. Then my hands breached the surface, fluidly parting the thick rock as I heaved myself out. 

I stretched out with relief as the empty space around me opened up and looked around. 

 _Huh_...

Dark walls surrounded me from all sides, hiding the sky and wind and freedom of open spaces from me. I jumped up once more, hands burrowing into the top of my stony cage, pulling myself through rock and wood until-

Air-  _real_  air. It flooded my senses as I took in a deep breath. The wind blew and suddenly the heady taste of iron overwhelmed my nose. There was a lot of blood... far too much blood. 

Screams echoed through my skull and I looked around myself with a frown. I was standing in the remains of a strange dwelling, smashed almost beyond recognition. But that wasn't what captured my attention. 

Instead my eyes instantly focused on the strange enormous creature standing before me, smiling down at me with a odd, glazed look in its eyes. 

"What the fuck are you?" I asked. 

It looked sort of like a human would if someone drunk on bad mead had molded its face and then stretched and inflated it in all the wrong places until it reached about ten metres high. The thing made no attempt to answer to my question, but instead, bent down and swiped its fingers at me. 

I jumped back and stared at it incredulously. Did it really _dare_ to attack a God? It obviously did not possess a very high intelligence.

Its attention seemed to be on something else now as it started to dig through the rubble, pulling something out. Pulling out a human. A new wave of scent rolled over me and suddenly I was moving. 

"Oi!" I shouted running forwards, pulling back my fist as I swiftly ran up to the thing. 

The human in the monster's grip looked down at me in surprise and started yelling something. It was possibly a call for help but probably a warning to run, to get away, since there was no way such a small being could take on that enormous creature. 

I could feel my body. I knew what my current form looked like compared to that thing. I probably looked laughable- but hey I just woke up. Cut me some slack. 

I ignored the human's unintelligible words and barreled forwards, snapping forth my fist as fast as lightning. 

The thing's leg snapped clean in half, bloody chunks of flesh cannoning outwards, sending it mutely crashing down to the earth. 

I ran to the human and pulled it-  _oh it's a female_ \-  pulled her out of the smiling monster's tight grip. The monster who's leg was already growing back...

_...what the hell have I woken up to?_

"How do I stop it?" I asked the human as I took her in my arms, jumping back out of range with her. 

She stared at me through a haze of pain, shock, and confusion. 

"Ai duohn't uhndurstahnd yu," she said. 

Well, that was great. A different language. How fucking long had I been asleep? 

I sighed, placing the woman down on the stony earth before walking myself back into the monster's reaches. 

"Stop now or I will plough you into the earth, literally!" I shouted out, projecting my meaning not only in the words of mortals but in a forceful wave of feelings and emotions that should scream its meaning to human, beast, or animal. The thing was obviously none of these things though as it ignored my warning and reached for me once more.

It clearly wanted to devour me with its drooling hungry gaze. I found this both ironic and off-putting. 

"Okay,"  I smiled toothily, launching myself forwards, earth hardening around my fingers to form fine claws as I ripped through its outstretched palm and up through its stomach and chest. 

A red pool of stomach acid and blood flooded out of the hole. Arms, legs, and mutilated body parts fell onto the earth with horrible sloppy thumps. A miniature human hand slid towards me in the rush of fluid and my eyes took on a green glow. 

As of that moment, that thing was officially  _dead_. It didn't seem to understand that little fact though, pushing forwards its teeth to try to chew me in half, ignoring the gaping crater in its stomach. 

I took another deep, red-soaked breath and pulled my hands up. Rocks and earth spiralled up in two thick growing columns as I raised my hands. With a quick tug on my right hand the first column turned in on itself then shot forwards, stabbing the monster through its chest, all the way up into its skull. 

It still continued to squirm, held tight in place but grin unfading, not giving up its worthless grip on life. 

I growled in a heated mix of frustration and deranged joy as I raised my left palm and sliced the pillar of earth and rock over the creature in all the different ways I could think of. A flurried rush of ripe blood and wet flesh heaved sickeningly beneath my onslaught until finally I thought to decapitate the thing. I had barely placed the towering spike though its neck before it shuddered and became still. 

I watched it for a long moment, not quite trusting the creature’s stillness. But the monster's flesh was now melting away- in an admittedly nightmare inducing way- so I trusted that the weird creature was finally dead, letting it crash to the earth under a pile of rubble. 

Panting raggedly, I turned away from the crumbling corpse and made my way to the human. Her blood scent washed over me anew and I briefly wondered if I would ever get away from the heady smell for even one moment. 

 _Probably not given what I am_ , I thought with a deep puffing sigh as I knelt down next to the fading woman. 

She stared unblinkingly out at me through pain-hazed eyes. I took too long to defeat that thing; she had been bleeding heavily with no help for a while. 

With a wavering hand, she slowly reached up to cup my face. It was soft and gentle and took me wholly by surprise. 

"Dahnk yuoo," she muttered. 

I held still, eyes wide, as I found my mind completely consumed with the soft warmth against my cheek, before leaning forwards, carefully placing my forehead onto hers and looking deep into her dark eyes. 

"I recognise your blood, it fell to the earth and woke me," I whispered into her mind, my eyes softly watching her as she realised the meaning of what I said. "I want to thank you,"

She gazed at me, her deep eyes registering shock as images flashed into her mind- a large ageless bird taking flight, a black haired mother crying into dead brown grass, a bear looking out at a star flecked ocean, a new man standing tall with shimmering gold flecked eyes and a small bittersweet smile on his lips. 

"Give me your request and I will fulfill it," I breathed into the pool of silence surrounding us. 

"...I have a daughter...took her in many years ago-" she broke off suddenly, spluttering as blood surged up her throat. 

I calmly waited, hands holding her steady as she spoke back along the link. 

"Save her…save Mikasa…save them all!"

I blinked. Then I blinked again. Then I smiled and kissed her bloodied forehead. 

"Granted."

Her smile was soft and pained but unwavering as the soft glow in her eyes faded and her body became simple flesh. My throat tightened as I sat up and looked away from the corpse. I didn't even know her name. 

I held no weight in the final matters of life and death. It was unlikely that I could have changed the woman's fate... but if she had wished it I would have tried. Instead she wished for the safety of her adopted daughter,  _Mikasa_. Offering her own life for that of another...

-And 'them all' which- when thinking on it- was very vague and could prove difficult to achieve. But, again, I would try my damn hardest to grant both parts of her request. 

Standing up, I unwrapped the scarf from the body and closed its lifeless eyes before taking in a deep breath from the red material. 

They definitely would have different scents as they were not blood related, but the little girl would also be most likely to have her scent  _on_  her. Sure enough, underneath the stench of blood and meat and urine that clogged up the city, a faint trail of the woman's herb-like scent made its way into my nostrils. 

I started running. Then I stopped short and looked at the stones beneath my feet. 

I have always been able to know a lot about the earth- how every stone was made, the history of the steps on a grain of sand and the ancient monstrous bones within it- I just had to have focus and ask the right question.  

As I placed my hand on the stones, image after image filled my mind, all blurring and shooting past so fast that I almost lost them. 

A girl with black hair was being pulled away by a man with blond hair, struggling as their combined weight pounded on the rock. I looked at her for a moment, trying to memorise her face but the image blurred and flashed past, revealing a gigantic foot, squashing the stone flat. Heading the same way. 

I wrenched my hand back from the stone and stared at it. There were  _more_  of those soulless abominations?! 

I ran forwards, following the scent, scarf tight in my hands. 

"Mikasa!" I called out, looking around irritably as a new flood of blood washed over the air, drowning out her scent. 

There was a panicked yell of a human not too far from my right, male, too young to be the blond man. 

I hesitated, thinking of my promise to the mother. 

_Save them **all…**_

With a growl, I threw myself forwards through the long alley to where a young blond haired boy was scrabbling desperately over broken rocks, away from a lumbering deformed monster. 

This one's head looked twice the size it should have been, limbs weedy and thin but somehow supporting its massive head and protruding stomach. It was disgusting.

Quickly moving forward, I picked up one of the larger pieces of rubble and threw it at the creature, squashing its enormous head flat into the ground with a clacking squelch. 

The blond boy looked back and tripped over himself as he saw the state of his attacker. The boy seemed to be in shock. Dumbfounded, he simply stared at it, then at me as I ran up to him and picked him up.  

"You alright?" I asked. 

He stared uncomprehendingly out of the biggest fucking pair of blue eyes I had ever seen. He blurted out something odd (I think I caught the word “save”) grabbing at my loose dirt stained shirt with tears budding in his eyes.  

_Damn I forgot again. Different language._

I sighed and turned away from the scene- holding the boy tight in my arms as he sobbed into my chest- sniffing the air and looking around myself for signs of Mikasa. 

The boy seemed to be saying something now, squirming in my arms but I wasn't really paying attention, instead I was breathing in the wind and looking intently around. 

_Ah... There it is._

In one fluid movement I scooped the boy into my arms and ran forward again, the boy making squeaking noises as I ploughed through rubble and over broken corpses.  He then started grabbing at me even more, pointing at something to his right. I spared a brief look that way and skidded to a halt, rocks breaking under my feet as I twisted and changed direction.

Damn. I hadn't realised my scent tracking was so off. 

I felt incredibly grateful to the blond human as we caught up with the black haired figure cradled in the blond man's arms, making their way to a crowd of humans. 

"Mikasa!" The blond boy called out, squirming out of my arms. 

I let him go, jogging gently beside him as the child desperately threw himself forward. 

_So he knows her then huh..._

The girl looked up, her eyes glazed and almost dead before they focused on the boy, suddenly bursting into life. She pushed herself out of the man's grip and threw herself at the blond boy, pulling him right into her arms, burying her face in his shoulder and pulling him tight against her.  I felt almost like laughing at the surprised squawk that the blond gave. I guessed that the girl didn't often give out such shows of affection. 

The blond man started talking, first to the two children, then to me with a questioning expression. 

Again I had no fucking clue what he was saying. Instead I bent down next to the two humans and waited for them to emerge from their shared grief. 

I couldn't feel any more of those...  _things_  around us but the older looking human obviously felt like they were taking a risk, stirring them from their embrace with hesitant yet urgent words. 

"Mikasa," I said, and her grey eyes snapped to me then to the scarf I held in my hands before her. 

The young blond started talking as Mikasa's trembling hand lifted and hesitated to take the scarf. The boy's voice trailed off however and his sky-hued eyes widened as he saw what I was holding. Slowly, carefully I took it and loosely wrapped it around her head, burying her in the swathes of material as she stared at me with wide eyes. 

I didn't smile as I knelt beside her. I didn't try to offer her comfort. I looked her dead in the eye and spoke my promise. 

"I'm going to look after you now Mikasa," 

They all stared at me again, confusion clear on their faces. 

...Bloody hell. I really would have to do something about the language barrier if I was to be this girl's guardian. 

But then there was a spark of energy echoing through the earth and air and a great trembling under my feet, and all thoughts of language faded. 

Picking up the two children in one arm each, I called to the older blond to move. If he didn't understand my words he definitely understood my tone as we threw ourselves forward, the man getting out of the way just in time for an enormous red fleshed and yellow plated foot to destroy the space in which we stood. 

My eyes followed after it as it threw itself forward, full of confusion. That was a very different being compared to the others I had encountered. For one thing, it had an intent. I could feel it, deep and burning, even if I could not understand it. For a moment I thought about going after it, but the light weight of the children in my arms soon put a stop to that notion. 

The man yelled something then waved at me and pointed me towards where the thick scent of humans emanated, before running after the Giant, jumping up and flying through the air in a way that took me wholly by surprise. 

I gawped after him as he flew, pulled up by strings through the buildings. That was… _different_ …

"Protect," I muttered, trying to focus myself back onto the current problem with a gentle shake of my head. I shifted the two humans up so their legs and torsos were supported against me, and started towards the mob-like mass of the rest of their kind. 

It was only when we got to the dock with the strange boats did the result of my earlier decision become clear. 

Humans screamed in fear and despair as an ear bursting crash of scraping stone and smashing rubble echoed through the city. 

I looked around and saw part of the strange white structure surrounding the huge village crumble into the earth as the back of the strange giant faded into steam beyond it. 

There was a hush as the humans around me stood frozen, staring at the sight with wide eyes, mindless in their fear and shock. Then the hush ended. Sobs and screams echoed through the city. 

I looked around at them all in surprise.

_Why are they so upset?_

I got even more confused as the blond child started to cry desperately against my neck, fingers scraping at my white tunic as he breathed soft hitching words. I ignored the mild discomfort and tickling feeling of sobbing breath on my neck and turned my head to look at Mikasa. 

The girl was quiet for a long moment, looking at the hole then at me; then she started pointing at the river and saying something. 

I brought my head to meet hers and looked in her eyes, startling her slightly as she stared back, cheeks flushed. She hesitantly started again. 

"We need to get on a boat."

I nodded at this, cementing the words and their meaning in my head as I made my way forwards and through the crowd of terrified scrabbling humans. 

I walked backwards through the mass, weaving and dodging when I could, using my body as a shield and battering ram when I couldn't. Soon we made our way to the front but to the dismay of the children the boat was already leaving. 

_The hell to that!_

I threw myself forwards, ignoring the yells of the humans, the desperate grabs from the green cloaked humans and the panicked shouts from within my arms.  

Shouts and yells which all faded into disbelieving silence as I lightly landed on the wooden railing of the boat and placed the two children down in one of the cramped gaps in the squashed crowd of humans. The children were staring at me with round disbelieving eyes. 

The other humans were staring too but the sight of their broken wall kept drawing their attention too and soon they were wrapped up in their mysterious grief once again. I sighed at their strange behaviour, looking around myself and at the huge number of humans surrounding me. 

Hell, were there always so many humans? 

 _I suppose it's an evacuation of a large settlement,_ I thought as I jumped down from the railing, a space immediately opening up around me, _but I don't think I have ever seen so many of their kind crammed into one place before._

I looked back at the humans still on the side of the bank. Another boat was being pulled up, a much smaller one this time but the humans swarmed over it like ants in their desperate struggle to get out. To get away. 

It was slightly unnerving. 

The fact that we were now moving over water didn't help much either. 

Water is amazing. Silky and silver, still and achingly blue or rough and bright white. I always admired it and loved to dip my fingers in the soothing liquid but my roots were not from water, at least not directly. 

The only water I had domain over was the secret rivers in the earth, dark and hidden deep deep below everything, never seeing the light of night nor day.  

But in my true element I was the pulse of stone and sand, the heat deep in the bones of the world, the seeds that bloomed into all manner of creation. 

And here I was bobbing along on a river in a strange jumbled human contraption surrounded by screaming and wailing mortals. 

I rubbed my head, trying to ease the building headache. 

 

_What the hell is going on?_


	2. The City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God Eren and a city full of humans. He's going to have a hell of a time keeping his temper.

As the boat sailed on, time slipped by with a sluggish, painful slowness. In this monotonous passing of the hours, a string of debates danced through my head. 

_What is happening? Should I leave this ship and go back? Or am I to stay and protect Mikasa? **What should I do**!?_

My teeth clenched as the thoughts followed each other round and round in my mind while we passed by green and brown open fields. 

There were farmers still out, ploughing through the rich sun-kissed soil, pausing to watch the overcrowded ships pass by. Word of what happened in that city obviously hadn't spread this far yet... The humans on the boats had mostly given up shouting out their unbelievable warnings by now. I didn't give any warnings either, too wrapped up in my own concerns. 

I was supposed to save Mikasa- which I hadn't done yet- and I was supposed to save 'them all'- I presumed this to mean humanity- which I hadn't done either. 

Damn.

Damn, that woman really should have been a  _bit_  more precise. If I wasn't the god I was I could have taken that wish on in so many different fucked up ways. 

I used to know of a few psychopathic gods and goddesses who would have delighted in saving humanity from themselves by turning them into cabbages or some shit, or have them slaughtered to 'save' them from future pain. 

Again I stress:  _used_ to know. Usually I tried to stay out of those dude's fucked up business. Although if they had started killing any of  **my**  mortals then I would have made them  **my** business. 

But... I hadn't seen any signs of the other gods so far. Usually you could sort of sense their territory; it felt like a different type of air, sometimes a fresh minty taste or a thick slow feeling, sometimes a thick vile smell of rot or a shiver down your back, it varied from god to god. 

Perhaps the ones who lived right here were asleep, forgotten, like I was...

_Yeah... That must be it..._

I sighed, leaning over the wooden barrier, ruffling my hair as I tried to get my head in order. 

_Right first things first: Save Mikasa. Should I save her from anything or just the abominations? Is it a one-time thing or do I have to be her guardian until she dies a natural death?_ _Do I stick with her even when it could stop me from fulfilling the second part of the request?_

"Guhhaaah!" I shouted out, ruffling my hair up again, almost tearing it out. 

The humans around me shuffled away with concerned looks.  

I turned around to see the human I was most concerned with. She was asleep, head on the blond one's- Armin's- shoulder as he exhaustedly stared out into blank space, his hand wound tightly round that of an old white haired man who had yesterday come up to us with tears on his face, shouting at the blond before pulling him into a tight hug. He later tried to hug me too.  

Aha ha- no. That wasn't happening. 

I decided he was probably a relation or close friend of the boy's. Though with Armin, joyful tears could be caused by any number of factors. 

Mikasa had simply watched, face impassive and still- that is, until I stepped forwards to stand by her side, taking her hand in mine. I think I may have seen a faintest hint of a smile in her eyes but it was hard to tell. 

The boy soon pulled his relation over to Mikasa and they all started talking. Probably about me with the way  _Armin_  kept looking over at me. 

Oh and  _that_  first introduction, before the old man came, had been a bloody awkward conversation and a half. The slow over pronounced words and vigorous use of arms to state his name was: "ARMIN- my NAME is ARMIN."

I didn't know many words of their language yet but that was obviously what the boy had been saying. 

I was tempted to see how long I could keep the child doing his over the top spiel but I didn't much fancy playing the simpleton role. 

Instead, I just repeated his words with a scowl, introducing myself as Eren the Hunter, and was rewarded with the brightest fucking smile I had ever seen and a lot of interest from Mikasa. 

"Yeager?" She repeated with a strange sparkle in her intense eyes. 

_Eh... Not quite but close enough,_ I thought as I nodded. 

I was quite astonished when she threw herself into me in the next moment, wrapping her arms around my body and squeezing tight enough that if I actually needed to breathe it would have been quite a problem. 

_Wow these humans are so touchy-feely! It’s so fucking bizarre._

Coming back into the present, I realised Armin seemed to have snapped out of his daze and noticed me watching him, offering me a faint confused look and a nod. 

He had quickly realised I wasn't slow like he seemed to think at first, which spoke of a higher intelligence than many of the others on this bloody boat. Most of them were lost in their own heads, deviating between tears, anger and fear. But not all of them. 

Some of them seemed to be frozen in disbelief or were pretending something strange in their heads, with glassy smiles and overly friendly actions. One of them even tried to pat my head with an over the top baby coo. 

No. Fuck that. I was going to learn this bloody language as fast as possible so I could give those mortals fair warning of what would happen when they did shit like that. (No one tried to pat my head again after that little incident though so that was a plus.)

For a moment I debated asking Armin about the request. He may have been able to offer some advice. 

Ah but that would mean flat out openly declaring myself as a God... 

Yeah…generally humans didn't react well to physical gods like me, something would probably happen somewhere on the scale from 'Oh we can touch this amazing deity! Won't it be cool if I can beat him in a fight' to 'OHMYFREAKINGGODHESREAL! SHITIAMABADPERSONHEISGONNAKILLME! RAHIWILLKILLHIMFIRST!'

Well either that or they become like scary obsessed with pleasing me and sucking up big time. It really depended on their muscle to brain ratio I found. Either way the results were never good. 

Animals were much _much_ simpler to deal with. They either stayed out of my way or paid me tribute and  _then_  stayed the fuck out of my way. 

I think I actually preferred the violent option with humans to the latter. My last gang of priesters were pretty messed up in the head.  If I was gonna get any more I decided I'd  _have_  to make sure I got to choose them this time round, have a proper look at their backgrounds, ask them the right questions. Such as:

**'Do you know how to crush herbs and offer tributes? Have you now- or ever- decided to give your god hundreds of giant bloody rocks for no apparent reason? Do you ever get the inclination to run around naked during the full moon and try to drown young women in potato vodka?'**

Yeah…they soon stopped the last one when I got all prissy about it (it was like they didn't even know what the word sacrifice meant, and they were  **really** too old to not wear clothes out at night) but that didn't stop them from seriously weirding me out with the sheer amount of random shit they did. 

I took it something bad happened to those nutballs as there didn't seem to be anyone ready to greet me or even guard me- someone even built a bloody house on top of me- and I  **really**  should have been woken up ages ago, especially with all these  _things_  around... in fact, thinking about it, the reason I hadn’t woken until now probably had something to do with those  _abominations_. 

That made me angry. Sure my last priesters were idiots (even homicidal wackos at times if I didn't keep them in check) but that didn't mean they or their descendants should be eaten like that. Hell I didn't like the idea of any humans being eaten by those horrible things. 

I nodded to myself. Decision made. 

I would save Mikasa and everyone from the threat of the _abominations_. 

For now I would concentrate on getting her and Armin to safety, then I would go about trying to work out what in _my_ name was going on. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_Fuck. This city is annoying_ , I thought to myself as I waited in the shade of a stone building. 

Don't get me wrong- I had been happy to be back on real ground again, out of that gummed up crowded boat- but that feeling was soon swamped over by the sheer amount of humans and bullshit going on around us.

Humans had been herded like cattle along the streets. I had to physically pick up Armin and Mikasa again so they wouldn't get swept off in the tide. They didn't seem very pleased about that for  _some_ reason _._  Honestly I didn't really care. I just kept following after the old man as the children whined in my ears. 

Sighing to myself, I had butted my head against Armin's trying to understand a few more of their words. 

"W-what are you doing? Stop that Eren," he squeaked, sky eyes wide with shock. It was quite adorable really but not much use. 

I just decided to continue ignoring them, just focusing on getting them both out of the crush of people and to whatever passed for safety in this hell hole. 

And so there I was, leaning against a crude stone wall, a couple of days later, watching as the two humans lined up for food. No way was I going to beg for scraps but I understood that they needed to. 

Well that would be the first thing on my to-do list: get Mikasa more food. 

My eyes then wondered to Armin, standing next to his friend, with a contemplating expression. 

Technically I could place him under the category of 'all' but... I wouldn't have has much intention in protecting him as Mikasa and- oddly enough- I was starting to find myself really wanting to do that. He was sweet and protective to his friend and had an expression of deep intelligence that I found quite charming in his small form. 

I snorted to myself. I didn't realise I was such a softy. 

The solution to my problem didn't reveal itself until the boy was standing before me, holding out a white lump of bread for me to take. 

My eyes widened. 

_Well now...He probably doesn't know much- or anything really- about Gods so... safe to say he has no idea what he's doing right there._

Now other Gods may have turned up their noses at an offering of bread, wanting expensive and rare oils or prime cuts of long pork. Those guys were idiots. 

An offering that was truly worth something had a deep value attached to it. I often found that If your humans were well off enough to give up all that shit then it really wasn't quite worth as much as... say a piece of bread from a hungry boy. But this wasn't _just_ a sacrifice from his part. He wanted to give it to me; he wanted to offer his meagre tribute. 

My hands tremored as I accepted the offering. 

A flood of warmth washed through my fingers and up my arms; I smiled. 

Armin stared at his own hands now with a look of confusion before apparently shaking it off and starting on his own portion. 

I softly smiled again putting the bread in my mouth, and the warmth ran through the bulk of my body instead. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Armin pausing in his eating with a pleasantly confused look. 

As no boon had been asked, I would now have to watch over him until he made one I deemed equal to his offering and I was more than happy to do this. 

I smiled at my charges as they started to talk to each other. 

A strange thought presented itself to me as Mikasa chided Armin about something and the other chuckled quietly. 

_They would make good Priesters... It certainly would make keeping an eye on them easier..._

I shook my head and put that thought away for later as I watched again as Armin chuckled softly at something Mikasa said.

...I wanted to understand what they were saying. 

I butted my head against Mikasa's but she just stopped talking and stared at me. Sighing, I let her go. I probably had to learn the language another way, but that could wait. For now I had the task of securing my humans' safety. 

I looked around at the other humans fighting over food and the disdainful looks everyone was getting by the men with swords. Yeah…those bastards were starting to annoy me. Especially the two who had just stopped to say something to us, towering over us with arrogant postures and irritable lines in their faces. 

Again: No. Fucking. Clue what they were saying but they were obviously saying something pretty disrespectful if the looks on Mikasa and Armin's faces were anything to go by. 

Well I found that Mikasa didn't really show a look on her face per say. It was more the body language of  _stiff back + clenched fists= bad mood,_ while _scowling= good mood._ Armin simply looked distraught. 

I stared up at the one standing before me and cocked my eyebrow with an unimpressed look. 

Then the human spat at me, a glob of his spit hitting the earth just before my feet. 

**_Oh_**? 

The smile split my face as I stood up and gently tilted my head to the side, raising my hands, palms flat and fingers spread wide. 

The mortal in front of me seemed frozen in place as my teeth shined in the dim light and- 

-Then there were two pairs of hands on mine and I was being pulled at, away from the frozen man. Normally I wouldn't have noticed two humans trying to grab me like this but these two were my purpose and my promise. 

Mikasa roughly yanked me back, away from the guard, out of his sight, then butted her head against mine. 

"I don't care what he was saying about us or the others; you can ** _not_**  attack the military, for  _any_  reason. You  _will_  get in trouble. I don't want you hurt!"

The flood of new words rattled round my brain as I stared mutely, slightly shocked by the flood of warmth and worry I was feeling. 

Huh... Mikasa seemed to care about me. That was odd, all I had done so far was give her back her mother's scarf and it wasn’t like she knew what I was. Slowly she backed off and I couldn't help but open my mouth. 

"You care for I, Mikasa?" I asked in a surprised voice. 

The two children started and began talking in a rush of words. I rubbed my head in irritation, catching the meaning of only the odd word. 

'What?! You  _kaahnuh tuawqu_? Wuhii  _duihduhn'tu_  you  _sae_  any _fihnguh_?

I think they soon realised my  _amazing_  dialogue was limited when I didn't reply to any of the next flurry of questions. 

Armin said something to Mikasa then, nodding determinately to himself then facing me. 

"I will  _tuheechu_  you,"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Having a companionship with Armin had its ups and its downs.  

The up's mainly involved: seeing him be unintentionally adorable on a daily basis, his occasional yet refreshingly non-pompous offerings and the way he didn't wet himself when talking with me (not that anyone was doing much of that right now but this still hadn't got old yet.)  

The downside however was when he tried to teach me his language.  

Sometimes when I was in an okay mood, I could take his over-the-top expression and use of pointing, and be mildly amused. Most of the time I was irritable though, just about stopping myself from snapping at his faintly babying tone as my mood was undermined by everything around me. 

The conditions in this place were two things: fucking crammed and fucking dirty- and not the good sort of dirt either. It was sweat and piss and shit and the hot clogged up breaths of the masses, contaminating the air on all sides in the long row of joined up tents we stayed in. 

It got better when the next round of evacuees arrived. 

The young, the old and the ones who had arrived first were given priority to the rackety shacks that had either been quickly built or quickly saved from demolition. This, apparently, included my group of humans. 

In the little group I was now somehow part of, there were four of us. We had to share with another group of four, an elderly couple and their grown-up spawn who thankfully kept themselves to themselves, in our cramped one-room shed. 

I was getting very tired of this arrangement though. I was and always will be a wandering god, but in order to protect Mikasa and Armin, I had been forced to stay put in this squalor. 

Well that was about to change. 

I watched, intrigued as men in green cloaks road by me and Armin as we sat on two upturned market crates, trying to complete our lesson.  

"Stop," I told him in his language before pointing at them, watching with surprise as they approached the gate in the wall. 

Armin said something then about: people go out of...something? With a snort I grabbed his head and brought my forehead to his. 

Armin, to be fair, was starting to deal with my forehead bumps much better. He had stopped asking what I was doing in a squeaky voice and claiming that he was embarrassed. Now he just quickly repeated his words in the apparent hope I would then release him faster. 

"They're the scouting military. They go outside the walls to try to find out stuff about the Titans, kill them and try to get our land back." 

I blinked twice at this onslaught on information and new words.  

_So they called those monsters Titans... and those humans go up against them?_ Ithought to myself, intrigued by the notion.

"Um Eren can you let me go? People are staring at us again," 

Still deep in thought I released my grateful companion.  

_How did they kill them? It was hard enough for me..._  

I stared as they picked up speed, riding through the opening gate, and felt a pang of phantom pain in my chest. I wanted to find out.  

Of course I couldn't just go rushing off right then and there. Armin and Mikasa would most likely be upset. 

That's why I waited until the early hours of the next morning, when my humans were tucked into each other on thin blankets, the old man dozing against a wall, gardening hoe in hand as if he stood guard against bad dreams. 

I sat up from my false sleep and quietly made to leave, trying to avoid waking my group and the four other humans as I left.

 I paused when I heard a faint whine from Mikasa, her face scrunching up as she battled her dreams. I stared at her for a long moment then sighed, frowning faintly at myself. I was really becoming a sap. 

Gently I knelt down and brushed the long hair out of her face, puffing a faint steaming breath in her face. 

The grimace faded and her face evened out into calm deep sleep. 

Smiling softly, I placed my blanket on them and left. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, big thanks to SwornToDevotion, or Beloved_of_Maat on this site, for giving me great feedback on my writing :)


	3. Between the Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'I was starting to get irritable following behind the 'scouts', speedily killing yet more Titans as they headed towards a large forest. 
> 
> Why are they even out here? I wondered.
> 
> It was then that I saw the humans flying out of their saddles and jumping up into the trees, and I had to eat many of my previous thoughts. 
> 
> That. Is. Incredible!'

I thought it would be easy to escape the walls and, in a way, it was. There were no soldiers at the large expanse of smooth rock I came up to and the other humans understandably kept their distance from that strange stone barrier that was once entrusted with their lives. 

No, the difficult thing was how to get past it. At first I tried digging down into the earth... and digging down and digging-

 _How deep does this blasted thing go? What? It isn't enough that it's 100 meters high? It has to be 100 meters deep too?!_  I snarled within my mind. 

I was understandably really annoyed when I popped my head back up out of the ground, pushing the earth up around me like a giant molehill and shaking off the water that had started pooling in my tunnels. 

Right then! It would have to be the slightly more  _embarrassing_  route out... 

If there  _were_  any gods around, I sincerely hoped they didn't see me as I straightened my back, fanned out my hands, summoned the warmth deep inside and... changed into a rock dove. 

...Yeah well… it wasn't like I could turn into my preferred flying form in a city of humans. They would understandably freak and probably try to shoot me down.

I'd seen quite a few similar looking birds around the town and was for once kinda grateful in the offering those mad old Priesters gave me all those years ago.

I'm not an all knowing god, never have been, so it had confused me a lot about why humans placed such value in the dumb tiny creatures. They obviously didn't now though. I had seen several humans try to shoot them down, and not just for food, calling them 'pehsstus' or something. 

 _Not that they could shoot me down_ , I snorted as I took flight, quickly gaining height as I quickly and untiringly made my way to the top of the massive wall and over. 

Before me stretched what looked like an endless plane of shimmering grass, dotted with strings of abandoned, decaying houses and the countless bloated, lumbering forms of the Titans.  

As I let the wind buffet me upwards I thought vaguely on what they called this country now. The last time I was awake there were many different names for the enormous mass of land, tucked far away from the emerald seas. 

My mind drifted to that sea. Of the rising white mists in summer, the squeaking crunch of wet sand under my steps and the soft shadowed songs singing out of the depths of Poseidon's domain.  

... Perhaps once I had fulfilled my request I would be able to see her again. Pretend to laugh as she shyly whispered her awful anecdotes or listen to her strange moaning music once more... 

I shook myself of these thoughts for now. There was little point to them. 

Instead I increased my speed, waiting until I was out of sight of the wall before I let my second favourite form take me.  

 A warm ripple passed through my frame as my bones clicked and lengthened, my feathers fattened and grew into deep earthy tones that faded into almost pure white at the edges, my beak sharpened and sliced through the air and my feet stretched out into great yellow talons. 

Only the colour of my eyes remained the same; large deep green orbs that surveyed the world far below me, taking in each vivid movement below me in amazing detail. 

 For a moment I let the pleasure of flight overwhelm me, hard wind smoothing my streamline feathers as I angled myself to greater heights. 

Oh how good it was to be in this form again. It gave me a pang of nostalgia from the days I always took this shape, scaring the hell out of any daft mortal who dared annoy me and observing the world far below.  

Then I heard something far beneath me, shaking me from my dusty memories and bringing me to the present. It was slightly hard to hear over the rush of winds but as I opened my eyes it was obvious what the sound was. 

A scream.  

On the plane beneath me, men and women on horses ran at full speed, weaving in and out of each other as they tried to avoid the Titans chasing them; trying to avoid the fate of all prey. 

I hovered for a moment, wings beating at the thin air to keep me airborne as I considered what to do about the small humans and bulbous Titans below. 

As much as I loved the sky it really wasn't my domain. I had little to no power over the heavens; I needed to get to the earth, bend it to my will to crush and rip into my enemies. But at that moment there were too many mortals, it was likely they would be caught in the crossfire which really defeated the purpose of the whole thing. 

Well only one thing I could do then. 

With a piercing screech I twisted in the air, folding my form inwards then bursting outwards as I dived down, sharp beak outstretched as I swooped and sliced through the neck of one of the larger 'Titans', cutting deep into the flesh and fighting the urge to recoil from the boiling fluids that ran down my neck. 

The Titan went down and I flew onto the next, snapping savagely at its heated flesh as I held myself in place with my sharp...talons...

 _Oh. **Oh**... right. _ I thought to myself as I then instead slashed at the weak spot with my feet. 

I jumped up, taking wing once more to push up high enough to properly survey the scene. 

Two down... fifteen to go...

Another scream, higher pitched this time.  

With an internal sigh I flew down again, this time spinning down in front of a Titan and snatching a small reddish-flaxen haired human from its grip. 

Said human proceeded to scream loudly. 

It was really  _quite_  annoying. 

I tried to tell them to shut up, but I think either she didn't hear me over her own screams or she heard me and promptly freaked that I could talk. 

 _Probably_  not the latter as the wind really was quite loud and human speech tended to come out garbled through a beak. 

Either way I was really glad to dump her on the back of another human's horse. 

I was surprised however when I heard the faint confused shout of thanks from her as I flew up and away. Well at least  **some**  humans had good manners. 

And so it went. I dived in, sliced at necks and generally saved the fucking day.

Blood steamed off me, robbing me of the joy of being painted in red but the happiness still budded in my mind as I slaughtered my prey, protecting the humans who ran on ahead on the shoulders of their horse companions.  

To be honest I wasn't feeling very impressed with these 'scouts' so far. 

How were they supposed to kill Titans like this? 

Answer was: they weren't. 

I was starting to get irritable following behind them, speedily killing yet more Titans, as they headed towards a large forest. 

_Why are they even out here?_

It was then that I saw the humans flying out of their saddles and jumping up into the trees, and I had to eat many of my previous thoughts. 

_That. Is. Incredible!_

I perched on a tree, high in the canopy as I watched the humans shoot forwards with impressive speed for their kind. 

They danced in the air as if the gods themselves had given them invisible wings. They spun and jumped, green cloaks fanning out behind them and faces full of determination. 

But as I watched, I realised they used not wings but metal wires and some strange thing attached to their belts; like that blond man back in the broken city. 

 _Fantastic! Amazing! Ingenious!_ If a giant eagle could grin I would have done it.

Instead I took flight again, trying to keep the humans in sight as they made their way through the forest. 

I softly screeched in delight as they doubled back, swinging round to slice down on the necks of the two nearest Titans following them. 

I heard several of them shouting orders and watched as they moved on. 

They seemed much more within their element now, soaring through the air and not along the earth. They would probably be okay for now. 

 I turned from my watch and beat my wings hard, eyes focused on the horizon, as I made my way back to the wall. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I think it was late afternoon by the time I had got back to the wall, fluttering down from the top in my smaller rock dove body. 

Quickly ducking into a thick tree I transformed, only to startle and fall out as my name was suddenly yelled.  

“Eren!”

There was a sound of running feet approaching as I rubbed my heads softly from where it had collided with a large, round, slightly shiny looking object. 

I was distracted from wondering what the hell it was by another shout.  

"Eren!" Called the voice again and suddenly-  _oh hello_ \- a frantic looking Mikasa was grabbing at me, running her fingers through my hair and glaring at me with, let's be honest here, quite a scary look in her eye. 

"Where have you been Eren?! Wu-hen we wu-oak up you were guh-on!" She started snarling, hitting my arm angrily once she was satisfied my head wasn't bruised up. 

For a moment I wasn't quite sure how to react to all this and just stared at her with a blank expression. Should I be pleased she was concerned, irked by her smothering attitude or annoyed that she dared strike me? 

Then her eyes met mine and the hard dark look softened into a silver grey as she asked:

"Are you okay?" 

Slowly my face transformed from that blank look into a vivid aching smile as I brought my forehead to rest against hers, my mind still up in the sky and not really thinking properly at all. 

"I'm fine, my little one. I was watching the sky and let my mind and the time fly away,"  

Mikasa positively stared. Her eyes wide as she gazed unflinchingly at me. 

I then realised I had spoken in my own words across to her mind.

...Oh fuck. 

And I had managed to avoid it so well so far. Perhaps she wouldn't realise? Think that they were simply words?

She didn't once look away from me though, not even flinching as I could feel those words circling through her brilliant mind. 

It made me smile all the brighter at the brave human before me as she simply gazed with calm, warm eyes. 

No I would not-  _could_  not be furious with her caring nature any more than I could be angry with the Sun for being too warm. 

Chuckling softly I took her unresisting hand and lead her up into the tree, subtly bending the branches and trunk to give her better hand-holds as she quietly climbed after me. 

The leaves seemed to surround us in a green and gold cocoon as we sat together on a thick curved branch. I smiled at the faint gasp she gave as she saw that sweet achingly deep blue sky peering through a large gap in the sunlit greenery above our heads.

"You can't see the walls here," she spoke softly before turning to look at me. 

"You're not-" She started to whisper quietly, cutting herself off, not quite meeting my eyes as she gazed down at her thin hands. 

Then she blurted out a long string of words, vowels tripping over each other in her rush to get the incomprehensible words out. 

I blinked several times. Uh she said something about me saving, my gender and being a small or strong and people? 

I looked blankly at her and scratched my head with a shrug, not entirely sure what she had said. 

Suddenly she started to laugh. It was quiet at first, a faint juddering in her shoulders that I almost confused as a sign of tears, but then I realised and the once soft snorting giggles only seemed to grow with my mystified look. 

The thing about laughing though is no one can stay straight faced around it for long. Soon I was fighting a grin, confusion fading as light chuckles burst through my lips. 

Her laughs slowed to a gentle trickle and started to fade into a tranquil hush. 

She stared back up at the sky, silver-grey eyes taking on a blue shine in the faint light, as she released a deep breathy sigh...

"What happened back when the Wall broke Eren?" She asked abruptly. 

My smile stayed in place but I was surprised by the quick twist in topic. I was even more surprised that she wanted to talk about  _that_  however. 

"You want to talk about?" I asked in a careful tone, giving her one last chance to go back to laughter and blue skies. 

She nodded. So I told her.

Not all of it mind you. I skipped the bit where I climbed out from underneath their house and the bit where I killed the Titan and the bit where I made a god deal and-

Well there were quite a few bits I missed out. 

Mikasa's eyes widened and fell as I haltingly told her of her Mother's fate, how she thought of Mikasa in her final moments... 

The girl was silent for the longest time. Just sitting, unrelentingly staring at me, lips pulled in tight and back ridged. She didn't say anything. She had nothing she  _could_  say. 

Understandable really. From what I had seen so far of her language it was quite limited in way of expressing different forms of remorse. 

Sad. It was such a small word. One short sharp burst of sound for such a burning prolonged weight in your body and soul, for the leaden way your limbs could shake from the inside and how your eyes and mind created pale ghosts and bittersweet dreams of the past. 

This language didn't make sense sometimes...

"I'm... it's good she didn't die alone," she finally said, faint light shimmering in her eyes as she looked away from me, hands clenched. Her fingernails dug deep into her own flesh as she took deep breaths and struggled against her thoughts. 

I took her hands in mine, gently prying her fingers out of her palm. 

"What was name?" 

Mikasa frowned then looked up, movements slow and expression faintly dismayed.  

"You don't noe?"

I thought for a moment eyes flickering as I quickly worked out what that word meant. 

"I don't noe. I did not see,"

Mikasa seemed thoughtful for a moment then hesitantly leaned forwards, much to my surprise, to bump her forehead against mine. She was learning.

"Aren't you related to u- them? She i- was called Karlua Jæger,"

At that I jerked back in disbelief, body tensing as those words circled through my mind. 

_Karlua Jæger? **Jæger**?! What? It can't be a coincidence that those who bore my name resided above my resting place..._

I was distracted from these thoughts though as Mikasa pulled further back from me, face ridged, her eyes dry now but lip faintly trembling as her hands squeezed mine tightly. She was nervous about something, almost scared. 

Then it clicked. ' _Aren't you related to u- them?'_

 Ah. She had confused me for family and now I had all but said I wasn't. 

I leant in again, bumping my head against hers.  

"I promised Karlula when she died I would save you. I will look after you Mika. Don't worry..." I paused as a new idea came to me. "I could do more than that if you wish. What do you wish for?"

"...family," she whispered, eyes wide and hopeful before she flushed and looked away. 

I stared at her for the longest time as she determinedly avoided my gaze. 

If I concentrate hard I can feel intent. It has an emotional feeling and a- well there's no real word for it but let's say ...it has a taste. Her's tasted sweet, like red berries and hope. I could feel it rolling in soft fragrant waves off of her and I knew exactly what she wanted from me.

"You wouldn't want me for a family," I told her sadly, squeezing her hand in mine and pulling back. 

She looked down at our hands then up again at the sky above. 

We fell into silence, simply looking up at the darkening expanse of blue above us. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

We couldn't stay in that tree forever though. 

The sky was darkening and the North Star was shining bright as we left the small cluster of trees and made our way through the streets. 

  _It's very quiet..._  I found myself thinking slowly as we walked through. 

 For some reason most of the humans had tucked themselves tightly into dark alley corners or were scuttling off the streets in a burning hurry... but not  **all**  of them. 

 There was a clattering of bottles as a group of men lounged at the mouth of an alley, watching us as we walked past. 

 Mikasa tensed slightly as one shouted a few words I didn't know the meaning of. I smiled faintly with a soft sigh and ruffled her black hair. 

 "Don't worry Mika," I said, there was no need to worry. 

 We were almost out of ear shot when the shouts of alarm came from behind us. We both looked back, a look of panic on Mikasa's face and a look of worry carefully painted on mine as the men fell over, shoes fused with the earth beneath their feet. 

 I suppressed the laugh in my chest, simply tugging Mikasa after me as we made our way back to the rough wooden shack she called 'home'.   

 Armin wasn't pleased when we got through the door. 

"Where were you?!" He yelled, glaring at me and then, to my surprise, at Mikasa. "We were looking for Eren together Mikasa. I don't- you shouldn't be wandering around alone," 

 Mikasa looked blankly back with a faint small flush to her face. 

"Sorry Armin," she mumbled.  

Then Armin turned to me and growled. He actually growled. 

I watched with an incredulous cock of my brow as he started to tell me off for disappearing, for having Mikasa stay out late, for going off on our own because it was dangerous here and that I really scared him. 

At least I think that was what he said. It was a bit hard to tell with some of the words he used. But something stuck out to me in his confrontation. 

"Why is it danger?" I asked, looking from Mikasa to Armin. Surely they were better off being behind the walls than near the Titans...

It was Armin's turn to look incredulous for a moment before he sighed and looked away. 

I bent down slightly and pressed my forehead against his.

"Why do you do that?" Armin muttered, still looking down. 

"It helps him oondursstahnnduh," said Mikasa from behind. 

"Well at least you're taking this seriously," Armin muttered, meeting my eyes for a moment before looking away. He took a deep breath and started to talk. 

"...everyone here has lost basically everything they once had. They have no money and very little food... There has been a lot of stealing going on and... Other things." Armin's face turned ugly for a moment and I was pretty certain what he meant by 'other things'. I thought back to the men and that word they said but before I could express my displeasure at this Armin started to talk again. 

"The people who lived here first aren't happy either, they think we're stealing their food and are going to cause trouble, there isn't enough of everything for everyone... I've heard that some people have already started to organise themselves into gangs- groups- either to protect themselves or to- to do other things."

My nose wrinkled in distaste at this. 

"We're in a good place right now though," Armin added, his expression perking up slightly. "We're near the Military post so it's less likely anyone will do anything here but... It's not a good idea to go too far out of the area..." 

I nodded to myself. The situation had gotten quite serious in here. I would  _probably_  have to do something. 

"You are very clever Armin. What do you think should be done to make this better?"

Armin started slightly at my words then blushed as he tried to think about it. 

"I don't know. There are too many people here. It's too crowded and there is far too little food and military police to keep everything together, we need more space, more military support and land to grow crops,"

Hmm... Well I could do something about the food that was for sure. The rest probably would fall into place once the Titan issue was taken care of, but that would  _probably_  take quite some time. 

I pulled back from Armin who sighed in relief at having his personal space back. 

"I will help. I can't be here all the time though. I am not in danger Armin, Mika, no need to worry."

"You're getting good at speaking really fast," said Armin in quiet shock, before the meaning of my words caught up with him. "You will help? Wait Eren you can't-" 

I shut him up by shoving an apple in his mouth. 

Out of my other pocket I dug out a pear and tossed it to Mikasa who stared at it, then at me in disbelief. 

Of course Armin started asking me where I got them from but at this point I started to get a bit disinterested in all the talking stuff and just lay down against the flimsy wall of the tiny room and closed my eyes. 

When I next opened them it was dark and Armin, the old man and the other family had fallen asleep.  Mikasa was sitting beside me staring at the uneaten pear in her hands.

I shuffled closer to her and rested my head on her stiffening shoulders. 

For a moment we both sat still looking out into the dim room then Mikasa's body relaxed and a soft crunching noise and mild sweet scent of fresh fruit filled the room. 

I closed my eyes again and fell back into my dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Eren is learning a bit more about the humans around him and the current world.
> 
> Unfortunately there is still a lot more for him to learn and I don't think he's going to react well to what he discovers :S


	4. Revelations

Mikasa was better about my sporadic disappearances after that strange, joyful day beyond those walls. 

Armin still got worried and irritable but he stopped spending all his time searching for me, preferring to just tell me off when I got back instead. 

I didn't mind much. When that happened I was still running on sunshine, open skies and free winds, smiling as I recalled my hunts, and already planning the next as I tried to calm him down with the gifts of flowers and fruits I had crafted from earth and air. 

It didn't really help _that_ much though, at least not at first.

For some reason he seemed frightened that I had stolen them, quickly grabbing my works and hiding them from the others in the shack, but as the weeks passed, the other family continued to pay us no attention (as per thank-fuck-fully usual) and absolutely nothing came of it, he started to accept them with resigned sighs of thanks. 

Bunches of large, shining buttercups and soft, sweet daisies lined the windows, perfumed white and pink wildflowers were dotted through Mikasa's hair, and the old man took to pinning a single scarlet red poppy to the breast of his coat, trying once again to ruffle my hair as he would leave for work. Apparently where he cleared spaces and built more shacks for the flood of asylum seekers. 

I was finding that Armin really was quite the clever human. Whenever he left the house he was searching for work, chatting to the locals with overly innocent expressions as they whispered gossip about this and that. I tried not to smirk every time he subtly directed the talk to different job opportunities. 

It seemed as if farming was the way to go by what little I understood, it had better food benefits and didn't require many qualifications as they would happily take cheaper labour. 

I felt quite pleased with the decision myself. I wondered what vegetables and fruit they grew here; the only food my humans were given by the military was one roll of bread each day, when they were lucky. 

I don't know what they would have done if I hadn't been able to craft fruit for them each day, pushing my creations into their hands or mouths before they could argue.

There was another pressing problem other than my humans' lack of food though. 

To put it simply the issue was that the other humans didn't have the same support as my group did and they were quickly getting desperate at the meagre supplies. 

I really couldn't go around giving fruit and vegetables out to everyone. At least that's what Armin told me when I explained my idea.

He was right though, I really would attract military attention if I did that...

However, while I had been hesitating, Armin's predictions about gangs were coming true.

It was no longer safe for the public to walk around at night, even in groups, unless you were the military or part of one of the bigger gangs- and even they weren't safe entirely. 

My humans had managed to stay mostly out of it. Being children and an old man made them much less useful in terms of gang life and, on top of that, they stuck very rigidly to the Military areas or at the hut after dark.   

But I was starting to notice, over the next few weeks, that the gangs of sallow looking humans were loitering around earlier and earlier, and in a larger number of places. 

Humans had hurried whispered conversations on street corners, murmuring things about the military police and having to deal with things themselves. 

Armin was hearing similar things on his trips to the market. He wasted no time in telling us that if we saw or were in trouble we shouldn't delay to look for military help, just run like hell into the military areas and hide. 

I found the idea of hiding laughable but managed to keep a straight face as Armin lectured us. 

About two days later we got the _exact_ same lecture from the old man. 

It appeared that many of the Military had only been intervening with things when they it involved the original inhabitants of the city, making the targets of the increased crime rate an unfortunately obvious choice. 

The flimsy wooden shacks of ours and our neighbours shouldn't have stood a chance when the looters came- 

\- and passed by. 

I sat in the corner of the shack unconcernedly playing with a 'pack of karrds' (a small, but interesting, paper offering from the old man) as the others hovered around the curtained hole of a window, quietly panicking and ducking down as the torch baring humans passed by and, to their surprise, kept on passing. 

Those 'karrds' were actually kind of fun.

I wondered vaguely, as my humans checked the barricade at the door and looked at each other in relieved confusion, how humans thought to use a few slices of mashed up wood in such a variety of ways.

The next morning the houses of the children and elderly in the refugee villages seemed pretty confused about the night’s events, with many strange rumours floating around about why they were spared yet their neighbours weren't. 

"I heard the looters were all the elderly, protecting us!" I heard one gap toothed child exclaim to a crowd as I walked past. 

"No my mum said it was the Goddess of the walls, defending the defenceless!" Yelled another, a girl this time. 

"I heard it was the shadow of death, a man with midnight skin who put his shadow on our houses to scare off the looters!" Exclaimed a skin headed boy of about Armin's age. 

"Why would death do that?!" The children started yelling at him. 

I raised my eyebrows at the loud debate but quickly dismissed it as unimportant and carried on with the others to the crop fields. 

Those looting humans had been foolish though. Even the military couldn't ignore the attacks on the refugees when they grew to that scale. 

 _What humans did to each other really isn't much of my business though_ , I thought a little later on as I ran a rake through the dry soil we were supposed to make life from, subtly digging deep into the earth with my bare feet as I made my way across. 

Those humans that weren't caught were much more subtle in their actions, less head on and blunt. 

The main targets still remained the refugees though. 

Rocks broke under my feet now as I stamped down hard.

It wasn't my business to interfere in human affairs but attacking the  _defenceless? The children and the elderly_? Well that was another matter. 

Perhaps that's why I felt such a burning disgust for those abominations or 'Titans' as they called them. It wasn't that they ate humans. That was fine, I would be a hypocrite if I got upset about that.

My problem was the humans they chose. In that they made  **no**  choice. Instead they tried to eat them all.

Innocent, guilty, young, old, they all fell victim to their obscene hunger. 

Such dark thoughts would often fill me with a deep bubbling vehemence in my stomach and an insatiable appetite for their blood. On days such as these, after seeing my mortal promises safely ' _home_ ', I made my way to the wall and took flight once again, quickly making my way to the large forests in which the survey Corpses were often encamped. 

The trees, while absolutely massive, were spaced quite well apart. 

This allowed the humans a lot of fluidity in their movements, and in turn gave me the chance to find and follow after them with much more ease. 

On the last day I would come look for them I found a perch to watch them moving through the forest and I saw a small group had stopped, looking up through the branches, staring at me. 

I stared back. 

The tallest, a man with blond hair and a thick brow, gazed at me with a steady fearless expression. 

I bobbed my head back once more, and then turned from them, taking to the air again to circle back and slice down on the neck of a small Titan. 

The humans moved on and I flew high above, my sharp eyes following the twitching shake of trees that followed their wake. 

 

Then the wind stopped.

 

For a moment the world went still and heavy with a bitter tang in the air, and I plummeted to the earth, as I quickly and ferociously spluttered and snapped my wings to and fro to stay up in the frozen sky. 

Then the moment was gone as suddenly as it came and wind rushed through my feathers once more. 

I didn't panic or curse or question what the hell happened. I knew what happened. 

I  _knew_  what happened... 

Gently, quietly, I lowered myself to the ground and slowly walked back over the soft forest floor to the edge of the place in which no wind blew. 

Grass grew wild and twisted over shattered rock; faint white woodland flowers entwined themselves over a rusted metal bell and around a small pool of what once would have been pure water, which now stood stagnant and choked with weeds. 

I took a deep breath, not thinking- no- not _caring_ that I had no real need of it, and stepped forwards onto the sunken and lopsided stones that once made a path into a shrine. 

 _It's no longer a shine though_ , I thought as I stared at the forgotten and broken remains. 

 It was the grave of a God. 

I fell to my knees, feathers moulting off of my body into swirling wisps of smoke, as I simply stared. 

I... I didn't know the God's name. They were most likely a forest deity of some kind. Small, probably took the form of a furry mammal of a sort, with strange ancient eyes peering out at the world. 

I stared at the lifeless mound of rubble and earth and came to face a truth.  _The_  truth. What I had been trying to avoid, to not face, for some time now. 

…The empty plains... the unmarked territories... the empty feeling that had been creeping in on _all_ of my senses. 

My eyes swept over the rubble before me. 

The Gods were gone. 

 

I was alone. 

 

* * *

 

I- I don't know how long I remained there, how long I simply sat, staring at… it. 

My breathing had stopped, my eyes had become as dry as sand and my body thrummed with the ache of being so _very_ still, but I didn’t notice. I didn’t notice anything but the soft bittersweet scent of the white flowers as they hung silently in their motionless little world.

Then there was a slow echoing thud in this empty air. 

Slowly I came back into the world, looking up and around to see the lumbering naked form of a Titan about to enter the faded God's domain. 

I couldn't even move as the hot, molten wave of rage took a hold of me. 

_How dare it? How dare it try to step foot here!? It would intrude on the place of a forgotten God who can no longer defend it!?_

My eyes spluttered and flared with green light and suddenly I could move. 

I stepped out of the domain, to where the wind blew once again, towards the lumbering thing.

_I will not fight on the grave of one of my own._

Instead I pushed back at the thing, fingers rushing into the thick knot of hot flesh in its legs and using my sheer strength to flip it onto its back. I was on it before it realised it was on the ground.

If that thing _could_ realise. 

_Your fault…._

My hands formed into enormous fists as I threw all my body into each punch, hammering down into it with no thought of anything but the feeling of breaking bones beneath me.  Fountains of stringy mashed up flesh flew up around me, my eyes streaming with golden tears as I carved a jagged hole it its chest with fist, teeth and fingernails. 

_It's **your** fault!_

I knew it could keep healing. So what? That only meant I could keep tearing into it, listening to its gargled breat- that's not right, its lungs were gone now- listening to the gargled noises it made as it was turned into living mulch. 

These Titans hadn't been here before and here they were now, where I could see nor feel no other Gods. 

They had something to do with this. They  ** _must_**  have something to do with this. 

_How dare you?_

_How dare you!?_

**_HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!?!_ **

Steam billowed out from about a mile around me as strings of rotten giblets and cherry red flesh evaporated away. 

The thing below me lay still, breathing raggedly as it stared at me through unfocused eyes. 

Then its teeth snapped forward with a clack as it mindlessly tried to devour its torturer. 

I spat in its face and quickly dodged to the back of its neck, killing it instantly with a revolted stomp of my foot. 

There was no silence after it fell though. No peace to allow me to reclaim my calm. _None_ of that.

No- instead there was the slow solid thump of another Titan as it drunkenly stumbled towards me, uncaring of the fate of its kin. 

I ran forwards, my voice inhuman now, becoming an echoing screech as I took wing and exploded through the thing's upper chest, savaging through what little was left of its nape before I flew up once more into the air. 

The Titans stopped lumbering towards me now, distant eyes rolling off me as I sliced and hacked and ripped into them. 

I screamed and shouted with each blow and spurt of blood I inflicted on them but they continued to ignore me. 

Why weren't they fighting back?

_Look at me. Look at me! FUCKING FIGHT ME!_

Then one did. 

Its head was tilted on the side, eyes deformed into small sightless slits as it blindly grabbed me from behind. 

I twisted in its grip as it lowered me to its gaping mouth. 

_Caught. Well okay you fucker, just try eating me, break your teeth on me. I don't care._

But it didn't eat me. Instead it simply juddered and fell backwards to the Earth, hand losing its grip and allowing me to break free with ease.

Not that I couldn't have done that moments before if I had wanted to. 

My wings spluttered as I pushed myself up and saw what happened. 

That blond man from earlier was slicing down on the neck of another Titan before jumping back to the tree, surrounded by the others as they asked for commands. 

He didn't answer them, instead looking at me as I settled on a nearby tree and watched him with numb interest. 

_If I wanted to I could take that as a sacrifice... he killed it for me..._

I made myself think of what sort of request this strange man could have. A man who put his own kind at risk to 'save' the life of what he probably presumed to be a simple animal. 

I had to admit, I was marginally impressed by his mind-set. 

Speaking of the humans, they seemed not to be handling this influx of Titans very well. 

The group of humans had quickly spread out, each tackling the Titans in pairs or threes as the blond one continued to expressionlessly observe me. 

I wasn't quite sure I wanted to accept his sacrifice now if he could allow those he was responsible for get attacked like this.

He looked like a real git. 

With a sharp screech I dived down from my perch and sliced down on the neck of a Titan about to consume a tall man with a short light coloured undercut, snatching him up as he fell to the earth and quickly tossing him up to the blond man. 

"What the fuck?!" Shouted tall undercut man. 

Ignoring them I dived down again, thoughts of rage and revenge forcefully banished from my mind as I simply attempted to fulfil Karlula's request. 

I didn’t fulfil it though. I didn't save them all. I hold no power over death nor time. There were too many of the humans in their grips to save them all. 

A male and female died before I could reach them, painful screams muffled and cut off as they were torn in half and stuffed down gaping mouths. 

And suddenly that stinging burn of anger filled me again, making my eyes sharpen and driving me forwards once more as my scream echoed out from me, human and eagle and wolf and bear and everything all at the same time. 

The stench of the human's fear and excitement surrounded me as I cut down on the last Titan, falling to the earth with heaving breaths. 

I was tired. I was furious yet calm, sad yet joyous in my slaughter, but that shivering, prickling throb of pain deep inside me just wouldn't go as I thought of those two humans who were still half alive and defenceless when they were swallowed and as I thought of the gods – oh the gods- my gods- it was all too much. 

_Too much…_

I ignored the yells and shouts around me as I jumped up, wings beating hard against the air as I took to the sky, flying back to where I knew my mortals would be waiting, back to where my last living friends were.

 

* * *

I fell into my tree behind the tall walls, exhausted not in body but in mind as I took back my usual form and lay back on one of the branches, simply staring up at the sky. 

I tried not to think. I just looked up, green eyes almost blue as they reflected the tender colours of the evening sky. 

Pink stained clouds flowed like ships across the shimmering silky blue sky, the faint lights of stars brightened and shone, moving across the pale expanse in their strange, ancient dance.

…I think it was night time when I finally came back to myself. It certainly was dark at least but I wasn't really paying attention to the sky any more. Instead I was suddenly thinking of Armin and Mikasa, of how I usually didn't stay away this late, of how they would be upset if I stayed out any longer. 

I speedily made my way back to the quiet shack, ignoring the groups and quiet gangs of humans lurking deep in the shadows. 

My foot froze on its way down to the earth, hanging mid-air as my eyes swivelled over the silent hut.

The hut was quiet… It was **never** quiet. Usually Armin and the old man would be chatting while Mikasa set up a fire and the other group of humans would be talking annoyingly loudly to themselves. 

There was none of that.

It was silent.

There was no fire. 

I entered the hut and the hush was suddenly shattered. 

"Eren! Oh thank Gods you're back!" Armin all but screamed as he threw himself at me. 

Startled I fell back to the ground with a sharp yelp as the boy hugged me tightly, red scarf held tight in his hand. 

"Armin what has happened?" apprehension slowing my voice as I asked the panicked boy my question, eyes fixed on the scarf. 

Armin drew back and bumped his head against mine, eyes wide and dripping tears. 

"Mikasa's been taken!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Duh-duh-duuuhh. Hope you like the mini cliff hanger :)  
> Poor Eren is not having a great day.
> 
> This was not beta-read unfortunately as I have been having problems finding a beta for this fic so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed it. It will probably be a while until I update this fic as I'm hoping to get a beta for this and also I will probably be putting most of my focus on my other fic, but don't worry I haven't abandoned this story.  
> I'll be back with it hopefully sometime soon x


	5. Taking the time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys... so I uh looked at the last time I updated this and it seems to be over half a year ago... 
> 
> *coughsorrycough* 
> 
> So... just to warn you this chapter involves a seriously pissed off god so watch out for gore and a bit of foul language (although that latter is kinda usual from godEren)
> 
> ...welp uh, hope you enjoy... 
> 
> *throws chapter at you and runs*

* * *

 

_Too much. It’s too much. I feel enraged. I feel angry. I feel horrified. I feel livid. I feel mad._

_I feel, I don't think._

I don't remember much of the time immediately after Armin told me what happened: about him walking home with Mikasa and some man from the field, how Armin left to talk to the stall owners from the market and came back to find only the stranger’s body and Mikasa's red scarf; before coming back to the hut, pleading for help. He had been waiting for me, hoping I would get back to ask for my support too. 

The only thing I do remember, straight after hearing all this, was Armin shouting out as I made to step out the hut:

"Wait- take me with you. I need to find her. I need to help," 

I stopped, turning to look at the frail child who hadn't been able to defend my charge. The frightened child who _clearly_ would have done everything and anything to help her if he _had_ been there, probably to be killed and tossed aside like off cuts of meat, like that acquaintance of theirs. 

"…You may not like what you see," I warned him but his expression only tightened as he glared at me, his pale sapphire eyes like flint. 

I took this as his answer and quickly pulled him onto my back, ignoring his complaints as I turned and left the hut. 

After that it was simple, I ran through the streets, only vaguely registering the shuffling weight on my back as I zipped through alleyways and vaulted over fences, following the scent of my promise, hunting after those sweet traces of my mortal friend. 

I felt- I felt far too much- but I didn't think. I didn't let myself think. 

Armin was quiet on my back, occasionally offering suggestions of places to look but otherwise lost in his own mind and guilt. 

It probably took just over half an hour to find her in the sweaty stench filled city, but find her I did, tied up in the corner of a shabby mold stained house with two other, older girls. She was the only one conscious, looking around with fearful, dazed eyes which offered an odd contrast to the quick movements of her hands behind her as she desperately scrabbled at the ties holding her down. 

Armin almost cried out as we saw her through the grime stained window but I quickly clamped my hand over his mouth, softly nodding my head at the gang of six men drinking and laughing at a table on the other side of the room. 

Slowly, carefully, I pulled the paper-thin window open a crack. 

"- sure that one will sell? I mean sure she looks good and Oriental is always popular but ain't she a little young?" Asked one of them, a tall man with a gaunt face and blood shot eyes, as he picked up a card. 

"Oh don't worry about that. I've sold younger on the market. Those old perverts will just _love_ her," laughed a fat man with crusty blue eyes. 

Armin gasped quietly in horror around my hand and I finally started to think again. 

_I'm not just going to kill them. I'm going to **devour**  them. _

Armin stared at me with a hint of fear on his soft features, as I pulled him down into a crouch below the window. 

Faster than the eye could track I pushed my right hand deep into my shadow on the earth below me and drew out one of my black blades, making to pass it Armin but hesitating as I saw the look in his wide eyes. 

"Where did you-"

"You still want to help?" I asked, looking at the child, the lifelong friend of Mikasa. 

He nodded fearfully but didn't take the curved dagger. I frowned. 

"...so what is the idea then Armin? What do we have to do?" I asked, observing him now with a stony, unfeeling gaze. 

"We could g- get the military," Armin whispered, looking down. 

I didn't even bother responding to such a weak idea, continuing to stare at Armin as he flushed and looked at his hands. 

"They look rather drunk, we could wait until they have passed out then sneak in and get Mikasa out," Armin tried again, voice slightly stronger. 

"Better but no. They are sick when not drunk. Drink can lower what small good thoughts they have. What will they be like in room with our Mika?" I said, voice cool and detached while my insides writhed and burned. 

Armin blanched at the implications, looking up at the window above us then back to me. 

"Uh- we could-" Armin started again, eyes wide and lips moving as he tried to think of ideas. 

"If we get her away what will go on? They will know we live here and we cannot run. Will they give up the money they could get?"

Armin met my eyes and slowly shook his head. 

"What do we do?" I asked him again. 

"…We stop them… we k-kill them," Armin gulped down and the paralysing fear faded slightly from his eyes, overpowered by nervous determination. 

I smiled, slow and feral, and passed him the black blade. He took it, fragile fingers wrapping tight around the dark, curved handle.

"So what's the plan?" I asked him. 

* * *

 

I watched as Armin knocked on the front door slowly, putting a wide eyed and hopeful expression on his face.  

"Hello?" His voice wavered "is anyone there?" 

There was a sound of a chair sliding back and thudding towards the door.  

"Who are you? What do you want?" Asked a tall man, standing up a good four feet above Armin. 

"My sister got hurt, could you help her...?" He asked in a small voice. 

On seeing Armin, with his shining blond hair and soft fragile features, I could see the man's interest peak and Armin shudder faintly.  

"Hmm, of course. Where is your sister?" He asked, waving at some of the men inside to come over. 

"S-she's just down the alley there, I pulled her in to hide so no one else would hurt her..." Armin's voice started to waver even more as two men poked their heads around the door and looked at him appraisingly. 

"Well tell you what kid, you get in here where it’s nice and warm, and these guys will go get your sister. It's dangerous out there at this time of night," came the soft voice of the bulbous man. I could just see his curved pale fish-like lips and kind crinkle in his yellow gunk filled eyes from my position. 

The tall man stepped out and behind Armin, ushering him forwards into the house as the two men left it and made their way towards me. It was less than we expected but I was sure Armin could roll with the punches. With a faint upwards turn of my lips, I pulled into the shadows and waited for my moment. 

Oh how I wanted to take my time with them, bite out their tongues, boil their eyeballs out of their heads and croon soft dark promises into their ears as I wriggled my fingers up through their flabby stomachs and peach-pink throats to use them as living puppets...

You know, the usual Godly punishments. 

But Armin was facing four fully grown adults in there with one weapon. Admittedly it was one of my blades but he still had no clue how to use it. 

I couldn't take my time but.... well- that didn't mean I couldn't make them suffer. 

Fifteen seconds later I wrenched my hand out of the larger one's stomach as he keeled over backwards and turned to the jabbering one once again, swiftly wrenching off his head with a sloppy ripping pop.  

That stupid, squealing noise it was making cut off. 

The house door slammed open and I pulled into the shadows once more as the thin one turned to see the blood stained hand of one of the men jutting out of the alley. His eyes bugged out comically as he took a step back in horror. 

Then Armin struck the man from behind, dagger cutting deep into the base of his neck. 

I grinned and made my way up to them. The grin faded as I saw Armin being wrenched back, dagger ripped from his fingers and turned towards him. 

I leapt forwards, bloody head still tight in my hands as I shouted out, causing the man to look at me and drop the knife in surprise or terror (I couldn't really tell)

The man was dead before I reached him though. Mikasa, somehow now free of her bonds, had picked up the knife and had gutted him in mere seconds, drenching herself with thick dark blood as she pulled Armin back with her to face the last two men in the room. 

The two men had picked up their weapons, a machete and a wood-axe, and had started to approach the two with angry hate filled expressions and vile growling promises on their lips. 

It was then that I entered and threw the hunk of flesh I had been carrying at their feet. 

Everyone turned to look at it and silence pooled in the iron scented room. The the head slowly swivelled on the floor, mouth gaping and eyes wide with its last, terrified expression.

All eyes turned to me, ranging from nervously relieved to pant-pissingly horrified. 

I turned to face the man who had bragged earlier of his previous profits from selling little girls to old men as his hand lashed forwards, pressing a machete onto my stomach. 

Onto not into. The cheap blade never cut my skin. I stepped back, watching as he overbalanced from his wide swing, bulbous arms pinwheeling as he tried not to fall over. 

"What are you?! How dare you-?!" Spluttered the leader, moving to swing his blade again. Then he stopped, staring at my face, his blue oozing eyes almost popping out of his face. 

I was smiling. Large and wide. **Too** wide. 

"So you are the man who takes child from their homes, who thinks little girls are like meat to make coin...do you think how long many are alive still?"

The man stared at me, the pungent smell of urine sweeping over the room as he backed away, staring at my mouth and then my eyes with a look of deep, unbridled terror. The other seemed to be frozen in place, expression reflecting his boss's. 

"Mikasa? Armin?" I asked, not once looking away from the petrified men. 

There was a long silence.

"Yes...Eren?" Asked Armin in a faint voice. 

"How brave you two are... shall I kill them now?" 

The men's eyes widened as some turned to look at my friends, eyes pleading. 

_Oh bad, bad idea you little fools._

"Yes," said Mikasa, voice quiet but firm. 

"Armin, Mikasa, look how _brave_ you are... It's now for you to go home," I said softly, not once turning to look at them. Not letting them see my face. 

There were protests of course, why wouldn't there be. 

"You two to look after each and two women now, step out, go get help," My tone became firmer and Armin and Mikasa went to pick up the women, whispering quietly as they left.

I focused in on the two men, smile splitting my face.

Literally. 

Flesh ripped and split, black blood dribbling down my chin. The room was silent but for the loud patter of black droplets oozing and swelling as they dropped from my face. My smile widened and widened until bone gleamed in the faint torch lit room and a jagged skeletal Cheshire grin glimmered out at my prey.

My humans were safe now. 

My green eyes spluttered and blazed. 

I could take my time. 

* * *

 

It was quite some time later that I stepped out of the red hazed house to sit on the door step and take a deep breath.

 _That was fun._  

My two humans sat down close by, frozen in place, looking up at me with guarded expressions. 

"You each okay?" I asked in a concerned voice.  

They both looked at each other, then at me and hesitantly nodded. 

"W-We found some of the military who took the women back to their homes. They wanted to know where we found them," said Armin, his eyes flickering to me then the house behind. 

"We said they were on the other side of the city, but we should get out of here soon," Mikasa finished with a firm nod, running her fingers over the red scarf once again wrapped firmly around her neck. 

"Okay," I grinned, coming down to line up with them as they slowly, hesitantly started walking away from the scene. 

"You sure you're okay Armin, Mika? Those things believed they didn't hurt but..." I asked, concerned about the strange expression on their faces. 

"Uh- I'm- Eren, have you uh done that sort of thing before?" Armin asked hesitantly. 

They were quiet for some time, just looking at me as we walked. 

"Ah... You're scared of me..." I stated, stopping and taking a deep breath. 

Slowly, softly, Mikasa turned to me, putting her trembling hands on my head, drawing my gaze down to meet with hers.

"Yes and no," she whispered. "You scared me yes, but I'm- I’m not scared of you..."

Armin placed his hand on my shoulder and I turned to look at him. 

"I- I am scared but... you... you saved us. You're my friend," he told me, voice becoming more sure as he uttered each word. 

"They- it was what they deserved," Mikasa whispered. "I'm not scared of you,"

"I'm- we're not scared of you," Armin agreed, locking eyes with Mikasa before turning back to me again. 

They both started to laugh weakly at the goofy happy smile on my face. 

"My brave friends," I laughed, pulling them in, hugging them gently. 

_No, they are more than friends!  
_

"You still want family?" I asked Mikasa suddenly, turning to face her with an exuberant expression which turned into a soft fond smile as I wiped a faint splatter of blood off her cheek. 

Mikasa's eyes widened then nodded, at first hesitantly then hurriedly. 

I grinned and kissed her on the head, leaving a red print of my lips. 

"Granted," I smiled, then I turned to Armin, the same question in my eyes. 

He simply smiled and shrugged. Ah, that would do for now. We'd sort out details later. 

I weaved my slick fingers into theirs and pulled them away, back to our home. 

As we walked my humans didn't hear the faint rumble of a house collapsing in on itself behind us. 

* * *

 

There was an unspoken agreement between the three of us when we got back: No telling the old man. This meant I had to go wash while Armin and Mikasa thought of an explanation.  

It boiled down to us doing what Armin had first suggested, back when he was a boy, of sneaking Mikasa out when the others were drunk. 

When I pointed this out as we walked back to the hut, Armin gave me a confused look. 

"When I was a boy? Eren, that was only a few hours ago,"

"Yes you were a boy. Now you are a man who fights for what he need. Like Mikasa is a woman not girl. You are both grown," I smiled proudly at them. 

Armin's face didn't seem to know whether it wanted to be pleased, confused or slightly horrified. 

Mikasa just smiled at me. 

I don't know how I ever thought my mortal sister couldn't express happiness or joy. That smile felt like fucking sunshine. 

I sat down just outside the hut, bone weary yet strangely satisfied. There had been too much, far too much happening to fit in one day. But that last bit, once Mikasa and Armin were safe... I smiled toothily. 

"Long day," I muttered to myself when I caught Mikasa's questioning glance. 

"Looks like Grandpa's back, you two stay out here and I'll explain," Armin nodded to us. 

Wordlessly Mikasa sat down and leaned against me until I snorted with amusement and wrapped her in my arms. 

"... You know this happened to me once before," she murmured sleepily. 

The contented tired feeling slowly drained from my body. 

"Oh?"

"Some men came to take me and my mother to sell in the capital..." My sister took a deep breath and clenched her fingers tight together. "My dad was killed when he opened the door, my mother put up a fight and told me to run, but I didn't. She died too."

I rubbed my fingers over her clasped hands, quietly listening to her story, my face stony and immobile.  

"In the end Dr Jæger found my parents and realised what happened. He called called for help, I got rescued by the military, most of the men were taken in and the Jeagers adopted me..." 

The door opened as Armin left the house to stand beside us but Mikasa didn't seem to hear. 

"These things just keep happening..." She said, voice almost drowned out by the soft whisper of the wind as she clenched down on my fingers. 

Armin looked worriedly from me to Mika with a lost expression. 

"…I lost all my family too," I said, blinking quickly as the memories from earlier came back. 

"I left for a time and when I come back they are gone. I think- no- they  _are_  all dead."

"Was it the Titans?" Armin asked, sitting down next to me. 

"Probably" I muttered, trying not to think about that, not to feel. "Found out this day."

The faint sleepiness that Mikasa had been falling under burned away as she turned to face me. 

"I hate them. I hate those things," I told her and Armin in a quiet, serious voice. 

She nodded, eyes thoughtful as she looked into the distance. 

"I'll kill them all. Thought they could get me, eat me but I’ll show them they’re not right."

"Prove them wrong," Armin muttered with a weak half smile which quickly fell into contemplation. "...I think we need to stick together more."

We all fell into silence as the door opened once again to reveal the old man with a relieved smile as he painfully knelt next to Mikasa and started to express his genuine relief that she had gotten back alright. 

I watched them talk with tired eyes, mind focusing instead on what Armin had said. 

Yeah I couldn't go back to those guards, I needed to protect my new sister and my friend. 

I looked at the old man as he turned to start talking to me as well with a relieved expression. 

Yeah him too... I'd protect them.

_I will protect every last one of you._


	6. A new promise

* * *

 

My promise of protection proved difficult to keep. Those other humans seemed determined to try to make my word worthless at every opportunity. I suppose it was naive of me to think that just by giving people food, their problems would be solved.

The thing was, there really wasn't much food; in fact, there was so much less now than when we first arrived. Now my humans were really lucky if they could get one piece of bread a day.

I thought, _logically_ , that if the fields held enough crops then everyone could eat and my humans would get their fair share. It seemed like a good plan to me.

With that in mind, one night, several days after the three of us collapsed back in the shack with the heavy taste of iron still thick on our skin and across my tongue, I slipped out and ran into the fields. I buried my bare feet into the dry, infertile earth, walking with slow, careful strides as I made my way through the field.

In the soft silver moonlight, towers of deep green peas spiralled up to the sky, fury puffs of carrot tops exploded outwards and the pale yellow petals of sunflowers rippled and swayed as they stretched upwards. I smiled as I made my way past them, dragging my feet behind me as pumpkin vines spread and swelled and tall sticks of corn ripened under the cold midnight light.

 _That'll do it,_ I thought as I breathed in the deep earthy scent of the fields, a small grin curling my lips.

* * *

 

The next day dawned with a cold grey sky, and I felt hopeful as we made our way to the field, listening to the wave of whispers and rumours flittering around us. I couldn't help the quiet chuckles at everyone's palpable confusion when they saw the thick forest of food before them.

Orders were quickly given, telling the humans to harvest the food and put it in a train of wagons. The harshly spoken commands for the humans not to eat the food annoyed me, but I just assumed that they planned to share it all equally with everyone.

I complied in the orders for harvest, fingers deftly plucking the fruit and vegetables. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my Mika pick a pear off of a tree and stare at it with a strange look on her face.

When I asked what was wrong she just shook her head and smiled at me. Damn, I could feel my eyes sizzling when I looked straight at that grin.

"This is so strange," Armin whined as we pushed the wheelbarrows along. "We didn't even plant half this stuff! How is this possible?!" He asked me.

I just shrugged and tossed him an apple from my collection.

"They're all perfect as well, not a single insect or even a scratch on them!" he shouted, throwing his hands to his head as he tried to find a reason.

"Lots of food for everyone then," I chuckled happily.

Armin gave me an odd look, biting at his lip, before turning to eye the wagons dubiously, not saying anything.

 

That evening I went with the humans to collect the food with an anticipatory grin and a spring in my step.

All smiles quickly faded into blank shock when I saw my friends come back with only one loaf of bread.

Looking around, I saw that everyone had got the same. No sign of carrots or apples or anything.

"Where is all the food?" I asked them in alarm.

"...It was probably taken into the inner city, Eren," Armin sighed, ripping the bread into three.

"What?! But that food was for the people here!" I exclaimed angrily, not taking the offering Armin held out for me.

"The crops are being called the miracle food," Mikasa said, taking my share of the bread and pushing it back at Armin. "People in the inner wall would pay more for it than any of us ever could,"

"...what?" I asked incredulously. They couldn't do that could they? There were humans starving out here.

Armin gave me a sad look as I turned my eye to the men, women and children around us as they stared sadly at, fought over and shared their food.

I turned away from my two friends and started walking away. I kept on walking, away from their worried words, past new buildings and old, past the guards and the hungry, past everything until I reached the fields and stared out at the once lush but now trampled, sickly plants. Obviously after we had left earlier more humans had come to strip the carcasses of my work. They hadn't even left anything to seed.

I dropped to my knees and stared out at the churned up mess. There was a long silence. A crow cawed loudly across the empty expanse.

Then a noise came. A sodden thump, a wet slap of skin against earth as I brought my fists down again and again.

 _They do not care for living things. I should just let them die,_ I thought to myself in that moment.

Quickly, a shuddering queasy feeling overtook my frame as I felt that dark thought festering in my mind.

Yeah... I wasn't going to do that. I just... I would just have to do something different... Something smarter...

I turned from the now barren field to look at the others.

This time the crops wouldn't be perfect or come up overnight. That was it wasn't it. I was too impatient to feed everyone; I'd have to make it look more "natural"...

 

By the time I got back to the shack it was near midnight and I was covered in earth.

Armin was, naturally, surprised when he opened the door to see a mud-man smiling back with pearly white teeth and bright, vivid eyes.

"What the- Eren?! What have you been doing?"

"I played in the fields," I chuckled softly, shaking myself like one of those canine pets humans always seem to have with them.

I ignored Armin's angry squawks as I entered the hut and pressed a muddy kiss onto Mika's cheek, laughing as she started to complain about my smell.

"You're in a better mood now," Mikasa observed after she had rubbed the mud off her face.

"I have new ideas and plans," I smiled, still high on the rush of earth and beat of evening sun, "I'm going to help,"

Mika smiled confusedly and Armin sighed loudly.

"You're not going to steal back the crops right?" He asked.

I laughed abruptly and loudly, wondering why I hadn't thought of that, but quickly dismissing the idea under Armin's wary but stern gaze.

"Nah I'm just gonna help some people. You two too!" I stood up suddenly and turned to look around curiously. The other family and the old man seemed to be missing.

"Where's everyone?" I asked.

"They're off at a big town meeting of some sort, not sure what it's about. Grandpa sent us off home instead,"

I grinned at the lucky break, some time alone without the others.

"You still have my blade?" I asked Armin quickly.

"I have it," said Mikasa with a curious tone.

"Good, here's one for you, Armin," I said, pulling a dagger out from the shadow inside my battered, mud-stained coat before I took it off and threw it to the side.

"Stand up. I want you to learn to defend and attack," I explained.

Armin seemed dubious, staring at the black blade in his hand.

"Where did you get these Eren? I didn't have time to ask before but I've never seen metal like this before."

"It's not metal and they belong to me. Now stop asking questions and show me how you stand with my blade," I commanded, turning to Mikasa who had already taken her stance.

"Widen legs Mika, put strong one forwards and put in strength to your feet," I commented as I walked around her, gently pushing her to see if her stance was firm.

I gave her grin as she passed examination and turned to Armin who hastily tried to copy the stance.

"Where are you putting your weight?" I asked Armin curiously.

Armin looked down at his feet with a crinkle to his brow, then he leaned forward.

"...Forwards so I can run,"

From behind him, at my nod, Mika gave him a gentle shove and he would have gone sprawling if I hadn't caught him.

"It's not always fair fight," I explained as he softly glared at Mika. "You need to put weight at centre, look all around. Don't look at your feet, look at people's..." I paused for a moment, trying to think of the word, tapping at my eyes.

"Ighs," Armin nodded, looking at mine.

I snorted and gently kicked forwards into his ankle.

"Not just ighs. Look at everything but also keep a watch on the face. It changes before an attack. You can know from the face, but that means they can too. What must you do?"

"Not give anything away," said Armin, shifting slightly as he tried to strengthen his posture, eyes quickly flickering over me then at my face.

"Slow down your eyes, I will think you're nervous and that makes me more happy to attack."

Mikasa seemed to be a natural, giving me a calm look as she held the blade, focusing on my entire body as I moved around.

It was then that I pulled a thick wooden stick from my jacket and Armin frowned, distracted for a moment, at least until I used it to jab him in the stomach.

"Don't get distracted."

"But that was too big to be hidden, where'd you-" he wheezed faintly, rubbing at his stomach.

"Armin, get back in your stance. Doesn't anyone teach you people fighting?"

"The Military do," Mikasa said, still firmly in position to my pleasure.

"Then maybe we should go to them and get you some lessons,"

Both Armin and Mikasa blinked at this, coming out of their positions to stare at me in surprise.

"You want us to join the army?" Mika asked with wide eyes.

 ** _What_**? No of course I didn't! I would _never_ risk Armin and Mikasa against those abominations.

But before I could express my disapproval of this idea, the flimsy front door started to open and my two humans went into a flustered flurry to hide my blades.

The family of four walked in, heads bowed and faces solemn as they silence sat down in their part of the hut and buried their faces in their hands.

The old man followed them, eyes downcast and hands in tight fists.

"Hey kids," he muttered with a soft, forced smile. "You been playing with the pigs Eren?" He asked with a light chuckle as he looked at me, trying to ruffle my hair again as I neatly sidestepped his hand and observed the odd twist to his lips.

"What's wrong Grandpa?" asked Armin with a frown, not fooled by the fake smile for a second.

One of the adults on the other side of the room started to cry.

The old man sighed loudly, sending the man a weary glance before pulling Armin in for a hug.

"They- They're sending us out...all the adult refugees, we're being sent out to reclaim Wall Maria."

* * *

 

The stone beneath my feet cracked and splintered as I slammed down once again. Cracks weaved out around me as I walked down the shattered path for- oh so much more than the hundredth time.

It was an early autumn evening; the sky should still have been a light cool blue, stained pink and orange with the setting sun. It wasn't though. Instead the sky was heavy with dusky coal-grey clouds.

 _Good, let it rain. Let it flood and wipe the filth of this land away!_ My mind hissed to itself as I threw my leg forward, kicking the largest boulder hard enough to send it to another field, taking out a fence on the way with a splintering crash.

_Damn. Damn! **DAMN!**_

I yelled out as I smashed down my fists on the last remaining boulder, again and again and again.

Grit flecked my face from the rupturing block of stone as my fingers made short work of my pointless, fury-filled occupation.

It wasn't helping though. What I really wanted to do was smash down on the skulls of those 'humans' who made the stupid, selfish, murderous order to send the refugees out beyond the wall; those who decided to have their own kind eaten alive on a whim.

Oh, all that "reclaiming Wall Maria" stuff was bullshit. I knew it, the old man knew it, everyone- absolutely _every fucking one_ of us knew it!

Those poor bastards weren't even going to get the proper training; they were going to get two weeks of basics compared to the three years that the army were given. Then those humans were just going to be thrown out of the only sanctuary they had to be consumed within the first day; the second if they were lucky.

 

I stared out at the expanse of farm land before me. The earth was much more fertile; the crops would grow strong and in huge numbers but now there was no point! Those who should be eating them would be dead.

I was tempted to blight them, to sour the earth with salt and stone and hate so that those humans couldn't fatten themselves with them, so nothing could be grown on the "miracle" fields again.

I didn't do this for only one reason. Well... make that two reasons.

Armin and Mikasa would be staying within the wall, even those murderous humans considered them too young to be used as fodder.

If they had decided to send them out I think I probably would have flown to their city and slaughtered them all. I held myself back from this now, however, as, even in my current rage, it registered as a vaguely bad idea.

I collapsed to the ground, burying my head in my hands, fingers routing themselves in my hair as I growled into my legs.

The first few drops of rain started to fall on the parched earth, throwing dry brown grains of loose soil up from the small wet craters...

It was the last evening and I was supposed to be in the shack with Armin and Mikasa, eating a last meal of dust filled bread and the sweet, ripe fruit I had made for them all.

But I couldn't be there. I couldn't pretend to eat while pretending that I was saying goodbye to the old man and pretending that I wasn't saying the same to my sister and my friend.

Water started to form rivulets down my arms, dribbling off my slack, shivering fingers.

Tomorrow when the humans left the wall, I would be going with them too, to protect them the best that I could. I had no illusions that I could save them all but I would- I would be able to save some...

It was a hard decision to make. Fuck, is that an understatement. I had felt torn down the middle. I didn't want to leave Armin and Mikasa; we were supposed to stay together. I promised myself that. What if something bad happened again while I was gone…but…

I made a deal. I made a promise. Save her. I had done that now...

 _Save them all_. I hadn't done that...

Cold, tacky mud was starting to pool around my feet as I stared down at the sloppy mess with empty eyes, my gaze directed to bitter thoughts and cutting memories.

It was Armin, in fact, who had made my decision for me. Not that he knew it at the time.

"H-how can they d-do this? He- I- I don't want Grandfather- he can't die Eren. He can't leave me," he had whispered between his hitching breaths as I crouched down next to him, hand cradling his shaking shoulder. I had yet come to realise the scale of and reason behind the decision to "retake Maria" yet; all I felt was confusion as I looked at the devastated faces of my humans.

Armin's breath stuttered at my touch and he span around, hugging me tightly as I blinked down at him with wide, surprised eyes.

"I just wish he could be safe!" he sobbed into my chest.

I bit my lip as the young man poured out his heart in liquid form and I gently, hesitantly, circled my arms around him.

"...granted," I had whispered, kissing the soft golden crown of his head, simply holding him softly, so softly, in my arms as a cool burn itched at my throat.

I came back into the present and felt another burst of anger. Not at those humans this time but at myself.

I needed to get back to my family. I wouldn't be able to see them again for a long time and here I was punching rocks and sitting in mud.

My hands clenched and I stood, sending a cascade of water off onto the ground.

I breathed out a deep calming breath, stood up and left the fields I had poured all my hopes into, _never to go back to them again_.

* * *

 

My humans seemed to be glad when I got back, Armin smiling sadly at me as I once again dodged the old man's head patting ways and allowed Mikasa to pull me down into a hug, faintly chiding me about my clothes before burying her face in my damp hair.

They had already eaten the sweet feast with the other adults (now sleeping fitfully in their half of the hut). I didn't mind, I simply watched my two humans press themselves into the old man's arms with soft, damp, forced smiles.

There was a sharp phantom pain in my chest while I held Mika as she ever so slowly fell asleep, head jolting up to tap my chin every time she caught herself. The almost-pain seemed only to increase as I breathed in her soft scent and tenderly watched Armin stay awake as long as he could, pressing himself desperately deeper and deeper into his grandfather's warm arms.

Sleep has a funny way of creeping up on people when they least want it, eating away at sight, memory and time. I could see Armin fight against the pull, desperately jerking his head and forcing his shining, watering eyes open, to keep himself from the time-devouring nature of dreams, but it was a losing battle.

In the end it was just me and the old man looking out into the dark, eyes shining with the faint light of other 'homes' creeping through the gaps in the shack's walls.

We looked at each other softly. I nodded to him and he nodded to me before pulling Armin in even tighter against his chest, resting his head against his and closing his eyes, inhaling deeply, as if to memorise the boy's faint floral scent.

 

It took two hours in that warm, sleepy gloom for me to finally build up the will to tear myself away from Mika and gently lay her down, bending my head down to hers to whisper ever so softly into her mind.

"I'm sorry I couldn't tell you this while you were awake, but I know you'd try to stop me or follow me with your foolish big heart...You'll know this once I'm gone..." I paused to brush a strand of her soft black hair from her face before I continued. "I'm going to grant Armin's wish tomorrow and I need you to look after him while I'm gone. I'm leaving you my blades; I want you and Armin to practice loads while I'm away, don't slack and always fight for what you want… It's the only way you'll ever get it. I'll- I'll be back once I've made sure they're safe." I promised, kissing her forehead with a fierce pull on my lips, not noticing the small droplet of gold tracing its way down her brow.

Mikasa moaned softly in her sleep as I pulled myself away, but she didn't wake.

I didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed by that.

I knelt down by Armin and the old man, lightly bringing my hand to the young man's head to trace my fingertips over his thin brow, feeling the soft thrum of heat emitting from him, watching as he pulled in gentle sleepy breaths between thin, parted lips.

I blinked rapidly and let out a deep breath of air as I rose.

It was time to save them all.

 

I swiftly turned away and left the house, not once looking back as I made my way out of the shack.

Not. Even. Once.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank everyone for your support in writing this story, you have all been so great. I can't believe all the lovely comments I've gotten and-
> 
> And NOPE. It's not over. Just part one is done ;D
> 
> I'm planning on making three parts of this story. I decided to do this as the next part is very heavy on original characters as Eren ventures out of Trost and not everyone likes OCs. So by doing this anyone who does not like this sort of stuff can easily skip that once I'm finished with part two. 
> 
> I did really mean what I was saying at the start though. Your support means the world to me, it really does.


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